I diverted my attention, went to many places and many things happened in my life in those four years. Four years, seems so short of a time yet with so many pain and happiness all intertwined, all weaved in my life, four years was long. I can even wish for my life to stand still in 2009 when both my parents are still alive and everything seem to being doing well.
Yet, I can't stop time. It ticks...and fade. By the second, every minute and hours. Hours turn to days, months and a year passed with me, living each day just like before. There was no big change until I met the man whom I gave and still gives my love and attention up to this day. I was in bliss. Smiling for nothing and laughing at everything. But just as life is not all happiness and as time is ticking away, as time is life and life is tied with the time I have, the people who gave me life turned their back away from life. Turned their back away from me.
In 2010, my father bid his goodbye, leaving behind all the foolishness that only human beings can do. Leaving his family broken, hurt yet angry from all the foolishness of this world. Yet, my mother came in next. Just a year and a month after my father bid his goodbye. My mother, who was my only anchor, the only person who is keeping me sane, the person who keeps pushing me to fly and dream also bid her goodbye. She made me fly all the way to Zamboanga just to return to her faded and worn out body.
No words can describe how I felt that day, July 27. I was far away. She was no longer with me. She was drained of life.
July 27, 2011 was the longest pain in my life and the shortest for the one who gave me life. Now that it is barely a week before that fateful day, it will be again my longest, and tears will again lull me to sleep.